ideal relationship: you tell me in great detail how i am more attractive than my enemies
men are so afraid of confident girls and its so funny
friday at school i heard some girl in the hall way scream “FOR THE LAST TIME BITCH IM LESBIAN IM NOT TRYING TO STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND HE SMELLS LIKE KETCHUP ANYWAYS”
teachers put the ass in assignments
i love typing because my fingers make that cool sound and i seem professional
I WAS ON THE TRAIN HOME FROM COLLEGE TODAY AND THIS CHAVVY GUY WAS SAT IN FRONT OF ME, IN HIS TRACKSUIT, LOOKING ALL BADASS WITH HIS DR. DRE BEATS HEADPHONES AROUND HIS NECK.
THE ENTIRE CARRIAGE WENT QUIET AND FROM THE HEADPHONES I JUST HEARD
yeahhhh it’s a party in the usa